Sad poem. Skip this post.

Yes I wrote this. Yes, some of it rhymes, and no I don't care that some of it doesn't.
Yes, it's sad. I'm sorry so many posts are like this. Just in a really bad spot.
In fact, don't read it.


*Untitled*
The end is almost here
The days are slowly creeping by
Forever I have waited
But for tonight, again I cry
I want to look ahead and
I want to now adjust
But I cannot deny the feeling
Tonight my heart is crushed

This one hurt me
This one lost it
This one doesn’t care

You’re the oil to my water
He’s the reason I don’t share
Myself, in times of sadness

I’m treading water, loosing strength
Loosing faith in you
I fake a smile, fake a laugh
It’s only what I can do

He’s the one I really want,
But never will he notice
I’ll leave in May, move away
And I’ll never know the boldness of what we just might be

Resorting back to one would tear me down to ruin
But maybe it’s the best
Myself I have not proven
Worthy of much else
Than what it was

You ponder me ever?
I’m fonder of you.

My patience is starved
My alley is carved
How much longer will it take

For him to find me
For you to know me
To go back, this life, unmake

Murphy's Law

This past week has been awful.

Murphy's Law: states that things will go wrong in any given situation, if you give them a chance.

I AM: MURPHY'S LAW.

Reasons: My computer is beyond fixable and I have to buy a new one. I lost my brand new digital camera after waiting [almost] a year and a half without a camera. My closet door broke off. My car smelled like burning engine belts. I couldn't afford my rent. My piano class has turned out to be impossible. I could go on, but reliving all of this is wearing me out.

HOWEVER:
~ God has been teaching me some solid bits of wisdom.
~ I think that Satan is frightened and has chosen to attack me at my weakest points [and believe me, he knows them.]
~ I am glad to have a computer, a landlord, a car, my rent check, and an education even if it doesn't always go perfectly. Any doubts? Walk through the World Vision "Step Into Africa" tour. It stopped my complaining.

I have a lot of thoughts to write down. Some of that God stuff, and some other stuff. But I slept 2 hours last night = I'll share later.

Good night, friends.